February 26, 2025

How to Break Free

From Volume 5, Issue 1:Remember when Coke cost a nickel? American cars had big tail fins? VHS was the way to watch movies at home and telephones sat on tables—and had dials? It all changed. We accept that things change. We don’t go berserk about cell phones or small cars. So why do we have such a problem when a rule we internalized back in 1975, like “You must clean your plate,” isn’t working anymore? There are some rules that need breaking, but doing it is hard, unless you understand where they come from and know how to free yourself.

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Bad Turns to Good with UPR

From Volume 5, Issue 1:Remember the story of Dr. Hew Len at the psychiatric hospital in Hawaii? He used the Ho’oponopono affirmation each time he came into contact with an inmate: “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” The results were impressive. The concept is based on the idea that we are responsible for everything and everyone, creating “bad” and “good” people and situations out of our (flawed and incomplete) Knower/Judger concepts. But over the past eight years, I’ve coached many leaders, executives, and family guys who have had a hard time even thinking “I love you” while approaching an arrogant boss. So let’s modify this highly effective tactic to make it more palatable.

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Who Loves Ya

From Volume 4, Issue 11In the chick flick Eat, Pray, Love, Julia Roberts’ character (a confused middle-aged woman looking for something that I never quite figured out) tells Javier Bardem’s character, “I don’t have to love you to prove I love myself.” At this point in the movie, most reviewers poked a finger down their throats and gagged, but I found a usable message that we can all use to improve the relationships with the people we love.

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