December 6, 2022

Conversational Foreplay: Making Intercourse More Enjoyable!

From Volume 6, Issue 6:When it comes to human sexual behavior, most of us know what foreplay is—and its benefits. It increases the intimacy between partners, creating a sense of trust and a higher level of confidence, and increasing the chances that the people involved will get what they want out of the interaction. As you know, I’m all about helping people get what they want out of interactions.

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Clearing the Mind

From Volume 6, Issue 4:Clutter. I have it in my office. I have it in my shop. I have it in my home (although mostly in my areas, not my wife’s). I can live with all that. What I have a problem with is the clutter in my mind. Constant self-talk, thoughts, judgments, predictions.

What does clutter in the mind feel like? To me, it feels like a traffic jam on Times Square, with thoughts and expectations and fears all trying to get through the intersection at the same time. Clearing the mind brings calm and order, a sense of peace, and the ability for me to get where I want to go.

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Bad Turns to Good with UPR

From Volume 5, Issue 1:Remember the story of Dr. Hew Len at the psychiatric hospital in Hawaii? He used the Ho’oponopono affirmation each time he came into contact with an inmate: “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” The results were impressive. The concept is based on the idea that we are responsible for everything and everyone, creating “bad” and “good” people and situations out of our (flawed and incomplete) Knower/Judger concepts. But over the past eight years, I’ve coached many leaders, executives, and family guys who have had a hard time even thinking “I love you” while approaching an arrogant boss. So let’s modify this highly effective tactic to make it more palatable.

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Taking the High Road

From Volume 4, Issue 10:My client Lawrence said something interesting the other day. I was talking to him about the tendency we have to operate from our Knower/Judgers because it’s easier and safer, and usually takes care of our immediate emotional needs. “Yes,” said Lawrence, “But that’s not taking the high road.”

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