March 15, 2025

The Forgiveness Thing

From Volume 5, Issue 3“To err is human; to forgive, divine.” Alexander Pope (1688-1744) It’s not the “err” thing I want to talk about. It’s the “forgive” thing. I understand people’s ire when something has been irretrievably taken from them. Theft comes to mind. Possessions. Virginity. Life. But the act of forgiveness is incredibly powerful. Let me show you what I mean.

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Making Space In the Beaker of Knowledge

From Volume 5, Issue 3You can’t stuff knowledge into a full brain! Sometimes we have to let go of something to learn something new. Consider a beaker of water, full to the brim. Now try to put some more water in it. Doesn’t work, does it? Just falls over the edges onto the table. So it is when we try to impart our wisdom to others. Is it possible to get others to drain a little “knowledge” so they can learn something more? I believe it is.

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HDClarity Tool Set: 7 Tools for a Clearer Picture

From Volume 5, Issue 2:Every article or video that’s appeared in this column is a tool for those who might want to change something, but who find their personal resources incapable of getting them there. We all need tools to enhance our innate capability to do things, and we often require a certain level of training and expertise to use them without hammering a thumb or cutting a finger. Here are a few of the many tools my clients and I use to get results and make changes, as well as quick links so you can learn how to use them effectively.

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How to Break Free

From Volume 5, Issue 1:Remember when Coke cost a nickel? American cars had big tail fins? VHS was the way to watch movies at home and telephones sat on tables—and had dials? It all changed. We accept that things change. We don’t go berserk about cell phones or small cars. So why do we have such a problem when a rule we internalized back in 1975, like “You must clean your plate,” isn’t working anymore? There are some rules that need breaking, but doing it is hard, unless you understand where they come from and know how to free yourself.

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Bad Turns to Good with UPR

From Volume 5, Issue 1:Remember the story of Dr. Hew Len at the psychiatric hospital in Hawaii? He used the Ho’oponopono affirmation each time he came into contact with an inmate: “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” The results were impressive. The concept is based on the idea that we are responsible for everything and everyone, creating “bad” and “good” people and situations out of our (flawed and incomplete) Knower/Judger concepts. But over the past eight years, I’ve coached many leaders, executives, and family guys who have had a hard time even thinking “I love you” while approaching an arrogant boss. So let’s modify this highly effective tactic to make it more palatable.

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Who Loves Ya

From Volume 4, Issue 11In the chick flick Eat, Pray, Love, Julia Roberts’ character (a confused middle-aged woman looking for something that I never quite figured out) tells Javier Bardem’s character, “I don’t have to love you to prove I love myself.” At this point in the movie, most reviewers poked a finger down their throats and gagged, but I found a usable message that we can all use to improve the relationships with the people we love.

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