Meet the Three Siblings That Can Banish Stress
by Stress. Struggle. Tension. Fear. Strain. Hassle. Pressure. Worry. Anxiety. These are the ingredients for a caustic environment, headaches, almost certainly fractious relationships and, if left …
Tag: Knower/Judger
The Benefit of the Doubt
From Volume 8, Issue 7:We all have beliefs—things we just know are true. Recently, I’ve been exploring my beliefs about doubt. Like me, you might strongly believe that it’s important to banish doubt in order to act decisively and achieve your objectives. But what if we’re…no, we couldn’t be…but what if…
Funks and How to Get Out of Them
From Volume 8, Issue 6:We all fall into a funk every now and then. It’s not a fun place to be. You have less energy, it’s harder to get things done, and all the color and joy can drain out of life for a time. But what causes funks, and how can we pull ourselves out of these periods so we can get on with enjoying our miraculous lives?
How Fun Can Seriously Change Your Life
From Volume 8, Issue 5:Let’s play a game. Imagine that you’re in a classroom. In front of you, there’s a professor, wagging his or her finger while preaching to you. (The professor is in the Knower/Judger persona, naturally…it’s the job.) The professor goes on and on while you sit there. How likely is it that you are going to retain the new information? Now imagine that you’re being given the same information but there is a game or competition involved. Will it be easier to learn? You bet! Here’s why.
Losing and Loss
From Volume 8, Issue 5:Sometimes you do everything right—dot every “i,” cross every “t,” hit 1,000 consecutive foul shots, invest in tech stocks just before the new one is offered—and you still lose. That’s life. Losing can be a valuable part of the human condition. You know the old saying “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% what you do about it”? Losing builds character, but boy does it sting. Here’s what I’ve lost recently, and how I’m coping with the change.
Call Me Crazy, but I’m Having Fun
From Volume 8, Issue 4:Why do I want what I want? That’s a question I pose regularly on this blog. Sometimes I just shake my head at some of the things I want, but later, once I can see the situation retroactively, I find I’m able to answer that question. This month, I did something that even I thought was a little crazy to want to do, but now that I’ve done it, I see how much joy there is in just letting yourself want what you want.
Questioning Universal Beliefs
From Volume 8, Issue 4:Be perfect. Be strong. Hurry up. Please others. Try hard. Any of these beliefs sound familiar? I know I have them. I can picture my parents admonishing me to be these things, frequently adding the word “should.” I “should” be perfect, please others, etc. After all, who wouldn’t want their kid to be all these things, right?
In moderation, believing these rules of life can contribute to a higher quality of life, but when we allow them to take us over, behaviors can tip toward dysfunctional, even obsessive, and all we get is more stress. Here’s how to cast a little doubt on universal beliefs that are causing you grief.
The Fast Track to Achieving Your Goals
From Volume 8, Issue 3:Acceleration in my world of racing has two major components: power and traction. Using this metaphor, how can we accelerate to get what we want in our world?
Hunger Games
From Volume 8, Issue 3:Finding happiness can be easier than you think
“How on earth did you overcome a three-touchdown deficit with only seven minutes to play, coach?” the sportscaster asked. After a thoughtful moment, the coach replied, “I guess my guys just wanted it more.”
Why do we want what we want? How come some wants or desires are less motivating than others? It all comes down to whether we’re playing our own version of the hunger games, and playing for happiness rather than satisfaction.
The Benefit of the Doubt
From Volume 8, Issue 1:In our culture, “doubt” is normally considered a detriment. From the early days of our education, we are praised for knowing the answer and made to feel less than adequate if we don’t.
But I’m here to sing the praises of doubt. Doubt’s a good thing. If I doubt, it means I’m not sure. And too much certainty can be crippling.