Knower/Judger – Page 8

Rally your team with trust, understanding, and camaraderie

by KimMarch 15, 2017March 14, 2017

From Volume 10, Issue 3:I’ve competed in car rallies for more than 40 years. This motorsport involves racing custom-built sports cars through unpaved or unruly public and private roads in all weather conditions. It occurred to me recently that the rally team—driver, co-driver, service crew, and car constructer—accomplishes much more if we work together in unity, when we’re doing well and even when we make mistakes. Those teams that lack trust, understanding, and camaraderie simply crash. The same concept applies to any professional or recreational team.

The Nature and Nurture of Knowledge

by KimMarch 15, 2017March 14, 2017

From Volume 10, Issue 3:I have often said that knowledge impedes learning. I’m referring to Knower/Judger intellectual knowledge, which until recently, I believed was the only type.

Guilt Tripped?

by KimFebruary 15, 2017February 14, 2017

From Volume 10, Issue 2:I’m never exactly sure what the term guilt trip means. Does it mean I am on a journey of negative feelings? Or that my guilt made me stumble?

Let’s look at how guilt originates. We all experience it. From the days when the nuns smacked the back of our hands in St. Margaret School, to the Jewish mother’s lament: “You nevah cawl your mutha any mowah.” Every culture has ways to bestow—or, more accurately, attach—guilt.

Would Worry Help?

by KimFebruary 15, 2017February 14, 2017

From Volume 10, Issue 2:In the movie, Bridge of Spies, lawyer James Donavan (played by Tom Hanks) is astonished when his client, Rudolf Abel, an accused Soviet spy (played by Mark Rylance) remains calm while facing the death penalty in the United States.

Abel repeats: “Would it help?” three times during the movie, all while facing incredible psychological pressure. In addition to the death penalty scene, Donavon asks: “Do you never worry?” when Abel admits that he’s not an American citizen, and might not be a Soviet citizen either. Again, the same response: “Would it help?” The third time it happens is when the prisoner exchange is about to occur and Donavan asks: “Are you not worried that your own people might shoot you?” Again, he responds: “Would it help?”

Wanted: People who Know What They Want… and Why

by KimJanuary 18, 2017February 14, 2017

From Volume 10, Issue 1: What do you want? Money? That tops a lot of lists. Lottery win? More clients? Vacations? Love? Great sex? I’ve discovered that many of the things I think I want aren’t my true desires, and you may suspect the same for yourself. Discovering why you have a certain want can help you get to the bottom of what will truly satisfy you.

Feeding Yourself New Information

by KimJanuary 18, 2017January 17, 2017

From Volume 10, Issue 1: To his credit, President Obama made a very valid point in his final speech from Chicago. We tend to search for our news from the sources that most align with our Knower/Judger prejudices. (He didn’t use that nomenclature, unfortunately.) Nice for us, but this tendency, and the increasing amount of information we are feeding ourselves to affirm our prejudices, is tearing our society apart. How can we overcome this? Read more.

Reinterpreting Trust Issues

by KimNovember 16, 2016November 15, 2016

From Volume 9, Issue 11:Recently, many of my clients are having “trust” issues with employers, supervisors, direct reports, spouses, and family members. Many of us have also had “trust” issues with our presidential candidates. So what is it about trust that gets us so worked up? In the last years of his life, my mentor, Jut Meininger, was attempting to teach me that the foundation of all frustration is expectation. “If you manage your expectations,” he would say, “the level of frustration in your life would evaporate.”
What is trust if not an expectation on steroids?

The 2016 Election: An Opportunity for Change

by KimNovember 16, 2016November 15, 2016

From Volume 9, Issue 11:Some of us have been witness to some disappointing events this fall. The not-so-hapless Chicago Cubs won their first World Series in 108 years (disappointing to non-fans). A reality TV star with billions rushed headlong through the Clinton machine to win an election no one though he could just days before the polls closed (disappointing for many). And now I’m hearing nonacceptance. “The Cubs are not my world champions.” “Donald Trump is not my president.” But by condemning this year’s election process and its results (or the Cubs and their fans), I believe the protestors oppress not only the winners, but themselves as well.

Speak Up

by KimOctober 19, 2016October 17, 2016

From Volume 9, Issue 10:As Jerry Seinfeld has pointed out, according to the roster of common phobias, most people at a funeral would rather exchange places with the guest of honor than present a eulogy. A quick Google search suggests that public speaking is in the top three fears on over a dozen lists of “top fears” we have…and all scare us more than death itself! If you’re familiar with shaking knees and a trembling voice when giving a speech, or just refuse to speak publicly altogether, you’ll want to keep reading, because there is a way to get rid of this fear permanently.

Hey, Maybe I Like My Rut

by KimOctober 19, 2016October 17, 2016

From Volume 9, Issue 10:.Over my lifetime I have frequently identified myself as being “in a rut.” I do the same things day in and day out. I eat at the same places for lunch. I pal around with the same people. It can be a little boring, but comfortable. And therein lies the rub. It’s comfortable. But does that mean I should stay in the rut or not? Here’s why we like our ruts and how to tell if it’s time to leave them behind.