From Volume 6, Issue 6:When it comes to human sexual behavior, most of us know what foreplay is—and its benefits. It increases the intimacy between partners, creating a sense of trust and a higher level of confidence, and increasing the chances that the people involved will get what they want out of the interaction. As you know, I’m all about helping people get what they want out of interactions.
From Volume 6, Issue 5:Ever have an opportunity to correct a habit that’s getting in the way of your happiness but for some reason just don’t do it—again? Let me tell you about the habit I’ve been battling for the last three or four decades.
From Volume 6, Issue 2:For the past two months, I’ve been accosted with a certain phrase: trust but verify. Reagan used it to get into Gorbachev’s head during negotiations in the 1980s, and now I’ve heard it first from a client and second from my rally car driver. So I dissected the concept, and here’s what I’ve concluded.
From Volume 6, Issue 2:It’s our human dilemma. Our parents, teachers, ministers, villages, experiences all teach us valuable lessons about what to do in certain situations. Over time these lessons define us. They become our “Roles” in life. Locked in stone. Unchangeable. But are they? Can we move out of the Role and into the Soul?
From Volume 6, Issue 1:Leaders of all stripes—corporate, volunteer, even presidents of the United States—often exhibit symptoms of psychopathy. So where do we draw the line? When is psychopathy criminal, and when is it seen as “bold leadership”? Would you receive a diagnosis of psychopathy, and what would that really say about you?
From Volume 6, Issue 1:“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”
~ Buddha Siddhartha Guatama Shakyamuni
Where do these teachers come from? The proverb seems to place responsibility for “appearing” on the teacher. It’s as if teachers were limited resources, sitting on the sidelines of life just waiting for students. My take is that “teachers” are an unlimited resource, with dozens, hundreds, perhaps thousands of teachers for each one of us.
From Volume 5, Issue 12:Regular readers of this newsletter are pretty familiar with our concept of the Knower/Judger. It’s the part of you that lives by your embedded rules of life. It knows right from wrong…frequently to the exclusion of outside information. Usually I berate the K/J as the source of a lot of frustration and conflict, but this holiday season I’m letting my K/J off the hook and thanking it for all the good things it brings.
From Volume 5, Issue 11:We all have an “inner child,” don’t we? Sometimes it’s curious and investigating. And sometimes it’s mischievous and rebellious. Sometimes it just loves unconditionally (puppies and kittens come to mind), and sometimes it functions like a paranoid schizophrenic (temper tantrums).
Who are you when your child takes over? Jekyll or Hyde
From Volume 5, Issue 10:Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. It’s a Buddhist proverb, and I’d like to thank Jeff V. for putting it out there a week or so ago. Essentially, this proverb explores the concept that pain is what the outside world does to you, and suffering is what you do to yourself. It’s a very important lesson for all of us.
From Volume 5, Issue 9:The term “black swan” refers to the shocking discovery that not all swans are white, something the world was sure about until new data came in. Now it’s used for big, bad surprises, like discovering that playing fast and loose with marginal loans and generating huge annual returns on investments couldn’t go on forever and would lead us into a recession. We all have black swans in our lives, but we can change the way we deal with them so they aren’t constantly causing stress.
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